Why I stopped looking for a relationship and started looking for myself.

After being in a relationship for no longer than a month, after having him break up with me on the day I moved to university. I thought to myself 'ok Izzie, it was only a month my time wasnt completely wasted' And I didnt really think much of it, not going to lie I did have a drunken cry at the end of a night out on the toilet but... that was about it. Not because I didnt care for him or the relationship. I just looked at the break up logically rather than emotionally, which is probably where I went wrong, if I had let myself heal emotionally, I don't think I would be writing this post.

Ever since I got out of the relationship, it was as if I was on a mission to meet as many guys as possible and try and find a significant other. I re-downloaded Tinder (I know... I stooped that low) And began searching, I also searched during freshers to, which wasnt the best idea to do either as most of the boys I had met during that week were looking for one thing only... I don't need to explain that any more. This all started in September 2016 and it is now March 2017, so 6 months of searching and all I have to show for it is a few more people blocked on snapchat and a few more matched on tinder... no luck whatsoever, and why should I have expected to be lucky? I was looking way too hard and in all the wrong places.

Recently, I had a little down day, thinking to myself I was never going to find someone, most of my friends seem to be happy in their relationships (from what I could see from the outside looking in) and here I am with nothing to show for myself other than I have now watched Gossip Girl 20 times and shouted at the screen 'why can't I be Blair Waldorf and have someone like Chuck Bass'...anyway. My good friend Holly helped me get out of this ever ending cycle (or obsession) of trying too hard to find someone. She explained 'you just have to stop looking for a while, good things happen for people at different times, its shit because thats the way life is' And she couldn't be more correct. After a little cry, I picked myself up again and realised that not only do I have to stop looking, I also have to start working on myself, working on my ambitions and figuring out who I really am. In order to be happy with someone, its also important to happy to be alone, not lonely, but alone make sure to know the difference between the two.

So, I am still working on myself, still trying to figure out who I am and what I want from life but also spending it with the people I love the most, family and friends. Also, I am only 19, I have literally my whole life ahead of me.

Also I have so many excite things coming up! Dublin in a few days time, going to the Ideal Home Show, going to the IMATS, going to Wireless AND Tenerife!

What have you learnt from your past relationships, what advice would you give to others on dealing with a break up?

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